Monday, November 01, 2004♥
i got posted to this bloody HR company where they does recruiting. everyday what i have to do is from 8.30-9 : do candidate's resume. 9-12: do telemarking and ask company if they wanna hire ppl, and ans i get is NO NO NO...~ then 1 hour lunch break is deducted till 40 mins. then back to office, do telemarketing till 5 all the way then, all the way to 6.30 like that u souce for people who meet client's needs. bloody hell.
i am really sad now, depressed, no moral and hate life coz i hate my work so so much to the exten that i can cry till my eyes swallon and have nightmares at night. if i am given a choice, i would love to quit. there was this girl who is a perm staff but enter on the same day as i do, she was under probation for the first month, and she left on friday, after one week, i also think she cannot tahan the work there. she quit, how i hope i can quit too.
they say ask me do what website is bull shit one la. BULL SHIT! they say only wanna give me an hour, but in the end till now i did nothing. i went to get MC today as i cried too much till my eyes puffed up badly and now having block nose and sore throat. doctor gave me 2 days MC. still thinking of whether to go work tmr. i never felt so bad before, i never feel this depressed before, never, all my life. even exams, O level, i also can take it easily, but now i really dunno whats happening.
my family got so scared that told me that its alright that i fail my SIP, they are not waiting eagerly for me to feed them. my aunt already called up TP and tell them about my situation. but till now no reply from them. i really never felt so bad before i cried myself to bed. i need to see a psychiatric soon already.
i feel so bad as my friends are all geting attached to company and doing corp comm work, except me. they have real nice company. i need to work longer hours than most of them. (my company really wanna make full use of interns ar!) my only friend from TP, but she's taking HR, was separated from me. she went to another unti and now we have different lunch time. i got nobody to talk to during lunch time, i lost my cheerful self as i am facing dead and boring people everyday. and there are so many nice eating place at Raffles place i dont understand why these people only will go to 2 places to eat, the kopithiam opposite my office and china square. they have go no life!, dun pull me down.! *SHITZ* i got someone sitting behind my me, monitoring what i am doing every single min. even what i say to the client she can hear clearly. fuck it la. i feel so bloody depressed.
everyday what i am looking most forward to is going home, but everyday they wont let me off on time. and weekends. sometimes i just wish life stop on weekends.
my eyes are swallon, i never felt so bad before. i'm scared of the nightmares i had at night. i hate it when i go to work. i hate it when i wake up before sunrise and go home after sun set. there's no light in my life. i just hope and pray for the best to come.
Parting is such sweet sorrow. 5:31 PM
